People Will See Me and Cry

Sometimes I wonder where I been, who I am, do I fit in? No I don't really. But I was thinking about Irene Cara and Fame.

My husband said to me, "Are we in such bad shape creatively, as a country, that we're remaking Fame?" Um, yes we are.

I've been to see a slew of movies recently, almost all of them terrible. I went to see Couples Retreat this weekend. The film had its moments, none of them funny. From the beginning, I thought to myself, "Hey, maybe I should've listened to Rotten Tomatoes."

Is his Junk Showing?

Couples Retreat opens with a powerpoint presentation involving "ball cancer" aka prostate cancer. Really bummed because this is yet another idea in our screenplay that is now out there, been done and poorly.

Then there is this bit where Jason Bateman breaks into Vince Vaughn's home causing the alarm to sound. Vince has to call his alarm provider and give the code word, ass-tastic. Might've flown if he'd left it at that but he chose to spell ass-tastic and then repeat it and then Jason repeated it and then I nodded off.

I also saw The Proposal -- spoiler alert, just pop in during the last 30 minutes to catch Ryan Reynolds shirtless, then naked. Betty White, an unbelievably talented comedian, is ridiculous as the dotty grandmother. And Sandra Bullock has done something to her face, not sure what, but it is entirely line-free and sort of waxy.

I saw The Ugly Truth with Katherine Heigl and Gerard Butler. I'm a fan of both actors but was shocked by the crassness and really just tacky love story that was to my horror, written by three women. "Flicking the bean" is a new expression I learned. That's all I can say about The Ugly Truth.

I know that critics are a dime a dozen and hey the truth is I've been sitting on my crappy-ass screenplay for years now. But as an audience member who has actually paid $7.25 just to get in, excluding popcorn and medium diet coke, I think I deserve better. Really I haven't even set the bar very high. Die Hard? Seen 'em all. Sandra Bullock rom coms. Check. As previously stated, I have a thing for Steven Seagal movies. So really, very low bar. (No knock against Katherine Heigl who was also in a Steven Seagal movie.)

I'm tired of Seth Rogen, Paul Rudd, this guy and Jonah Hill. Couldn't you cast Paul Rudd with Katherine Heigl and Seth Rogen with Gerard Butler? Or Vince Vaughn and Zooey Deschanel? She can sing and he can dance.

Shake it up a little bit. Go crazy. Take chances. I mean isn't the movie business the riskiest business of all?