I have studied French for much of my life so technically I should be fluent. In fact, that is not the case. There was a time when I was conversant, when I was living in France and forced to speak the language daily. Now I am rusty.
About two weeks ago, I decided to check out French conversation tapes from my local library. While focused on getting my pronunciation right and remembering vocabulary, I wasn't really paying attention to what I was actually saying. Then on my way home from work one night, it suddenly hit me. Those Pimsleur people really have a sense of humor.
Here's are a few sample conversations I'm learning in French:
How to Hire a Hooker in Marseille
Male voice: Je veux passer quelques jours à Marseille. (I would like to spend a few days in Marseille)
Female voice: Ensemble? (Together?)
Male voice: Oui. J'ai cent dollars et quatre-vingt euros. (Yes. I have 100 dollars and eighty euros)
How to (Not) Pick Up Women
Male voice: Est-ce que vous êtes seule mademoiselle? (Are you alone Miss?)
Female Voice: Non, je suis avec mon mari. (No, I am with my husband)
Male voice: Si vous n'êtes pas seule, je vais partir. (If you are not alone, I am going to leave)
How to Thwart a Bank Robber
Male voice: Donnez-moi quatre-vingt dix euros. (Give me 90 euros)
Female Voice: Je ne veux pas. Je veux partir. (I don't want to. I want to leave.)
Et bien, c'est tout!
NB: When I tried searching the term French in Google images, many of the results were people dressed like mimes. Not all french people dress like mimes FYI.